The battle rages on. It can get tiring at times. I have this new found energy, but at the same time I am exerting so much more to fight this demon that I am easily worn. It is OK though, because over time this power struggle will shift to the point where I will be full of energy and strength to accomplish great things. Until I reach this point (which will be in some time) I will be at war and needing nourishment to keep me strong.

I will receive this nourishment from my friends, family, romance, activity, and other positive things in my life.

I have done, and plan to do so many things I have been “meaning” to do for such a long time. The only problem was that the demon was ruling my life, and I was not able to do what I wanted. I did what he wanted. That has now changed.

I keep having brief thoughts in my head about “slipping up”…he is constantly pressing down on me, and once in a while I stop to think….I am getting tired of this pressing, maybe I will given in. It would be SO easy to do this…because I have spent half my life SUCESFULLY doing this. But I am at war. NO SURRENDER. If my best friend can leave his wife and baby behind to go to war in the most violent area on earth, at the most violent time of the war, then I can own this demon FUCKER.

That is right, I have resorted to name calling…actually it is more of a way to let out tension….and let it out in the DEMONS direction and no one elses. NO one else deserves that..NO one. I need to stay conscious of that; no innocent people may be harmed. Especially those closest to me.


Slip up? FUCK no. It’s on…has been…will be…forever. BITCH.

Day 3 Only the beginning.