I was fearless yesterday. I had a new found strength. It was nice.

Although I have not nearly begun this battle with the demon (I will no longer refer to him as “my demon” because he is no longer a part of me) the simple fact that I have consciously taken on this challenge is empowering; because it is such a challenge to take on. It has only been a day and a half since the beginning of this war I feel empowered. He can easily “hide” for a few days or more, and then rear his UGLY FUCKEN face whenever he feels like it. Not when I feel like it….when HE feels like it. This is because he is good at making me feel like I am in control when I am not. I have realized this. That is why I am at war with him. I want to push him in to the darkness of nothingness; back where he came from. I will need all the strength I can for this colossal feat; luckily humans are totally capable of such feats. I am only human, but to him I am the human who will end his existence.

It is time for him to go. It has been his time for a LONG TIME, but only now am I stepping up to the plate. His roots run so deep, that I can no longer tell whether it is my self or him who is talking in my head. I need to love my self more, and he will dissipate….forever.

Just this morning, he appeared and was able to create a feeling that I would miss him once I successfully end him. Amazing are his powers of influence! Truly Amazing.

The most amazing thing (which is also a key driver to my strength) is the fact that I know nothing else in my life will be as challenging as this war. Once I successfully defeat this mighty demon, other challenges in my life will simply be child’s play. It is as simple as that.

It is on. BIG TIME.

Day 2